A short review of Lo! Peninsula’s EP

The debut music CD of the Imphal based shoegaze band has released their first EP on August 18, 2018. The EP consists of six tracks, each giving a tantalizing deep dream. Here, as a music enthusiast, I simply try to write my thoughts on them; as showing gratitude towards the band. To my knowledge, their music has an unusual musical genre as they take an influence from shoegaze and Post-Rock elements, so fewer people will only understand their music in our state. In short explanation, their music explores the outer limits of guitar texture leaving the listeners alone in their own thoughts.

 

 

Since the release of the single “Chasing Tidal Waves”, they have circulated some handful of fans. Among them, I too became a fanatic of their music and they also managed to embody the growth of a new music in our city. What they are attempting might be complex and the song-writing process must be difficult as they reach out the cosmos of surrealistic fantasy. Thankfully, they did a great work and released a delicious Ep.

Meanwhile, while drowning in my dreams with some company from their music I came up some trance-like feelings and thought of eroding my experience of each track – to be honest, I was completely taken by the poetic aura of melancholic lyrics. And I have fully transcended into a dreamy-surreal world.

 

“Another Divine Joke”

Being the opening track and the first music video of the band, the track gave listeners a sudden feeling of stepping towards the imaginative world – taking it as a rhythm-driven song, the song act as catchy and mood activator music.

 

 

“Sleight of Hand”

Playing with fantastical games with listeners’ mind, this track is filled with a fuzzy shoegaze riff, and also with a rhythmic beat that gave an aura of cosmic tripping. Listening with closed eyes, the song takes to a place where there’s a sense of pleasure on psychedelic realms.

“Flashback Kid”

Taking it as the only instrumental track of this entire EP, the song densely cloistered up the listeners’ mind making a perfect tune to listen while lying on the open field under the cloudy sky. Opened by the deep airy-ambient tone the song starts with a slow drum beat filling the gap by the basslines. The song also demonstrates their influence on Post-Rock music. The profoundness of this track makes me choose as my favorite track and I would say this track is for the people who constantly gaze skyward and make stories from the clouds.

“Quicksand (Nuffin)”

Hazy images will run inside the head of the listeners’ driving them crazy inside with an irresistible imagination of their own thoughts. The sensory of tipsy mind will elaborate with the help of this track.

“Evil Favours”

Pulling out the distraught emotions of depressive lethargy, the song gave the listeners’ a certain pleasure of lost and weary– Dragging out the vocals with beautiful poetic lyrics the song starts with a sound of rainfall with slow plucking guitar tones accompanied by slow drum beats. The song grasps and engulfs the mind of listeners letting the darkness devour in the glimpse of light.

“Final Roar”

Capturing the mood of listeners, this track welcomed with a strong influence of Indie rock. The melody and upbeats tempos lend to vibrate the body of listeners. This final track ends with a chilling sense of good experience with happy feelings.

 

Above all, the astonishing artwork of the EP attracts the art lovers in different manners, impressing the artist to try the music and it also touches the depth of surreal fantasy making it an overwhelming dreamy state of unconsciousness. The CD cover and the lyrics catalog were finely designed.

Moving on with all the funny experience I had with the EP, I have had a huge privilege to share my contemplation of each track. Many good numerous bands have been there through the ages and yet Lo! Peninsula penetrates the heart of a music enthusiast. It’s an overwhelming feeling of happiness to have such a rare band that produces good music from our state. This short review is just my appreciation toward the band. The excitement and happiness make me pondered this small review.

Lastly, with further words, I would speak of this EP as “The soothing catchy-instrumentation-mind-altering psychedelic-induced music”. And to the people who haven’t aware of this band. Go to their Facebook profile and check it out. Their EP is out and available at some stores around us. Buy their CD, support them and get yourself experience in the dreamy world.

Thank you.

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A Whisper of the Stranded Soul.

(The following blog was written from March 5th, 2018 until the published date, except the part “Momentary Fortunes of my Life”)

 

This is a story of my love, my agony-filled love. Perhaps in short term, it goes by “Unrequited Love”. A part of suffering, a heart-wrenching, and a denial love. Throughout humanity, throughout millennia, love has been the greatest seed of virtue; where beautiful arts were illustrated. Since, from the ages of human civilization, love emerges as the key of hope. Love filled human mind as a delusion of survival. However, with a known fact, it seems that love doesn’t exist in the real world. But it still exists in the world of fictions; a poem, a novel, or a film, etc. Unfortunately, life is not a Nicholas Sparks’ movie. So, I turn my love into some kind of fiction.

Loving someone entails envy, jealousy, and reciprocated feelings. When you love someone or fall in love, your mind will tell you that he/she is the one. Nope, it wasn’t a love, it was desire and obsession. It will lead you to dark path and abyss of despair. When you open your eyes and found out that the person you love doesn’t even notice you. Well, then it’s the part that you’ll suffer. The fragile heart of yours will palpitate when you can’t have the person you fall in love. The pain of not revealing the stories we hold tight. But everything changes when you fight the excruciating experience when you divulge the deepest secrets and desires through art or writing. I put a lot of effort and lot of heartache while writing this.

This is the compilation of my scribbles, a poem, and a letter. A part of my personal stories.

“Momentary Fortunes of my Life” 

“My mind was filled with thoughts of her.
When I closed my eyes, a vision of her came rushing by,
I sensed the hallucinations of her wandering nearby,
One cannot halt my love of her
I don’t know if I could perceive her world.”

I remember that day it was a night during the festival of “Yaoshang 2017” when I gazed around I saw this beautiful girl inside of the car as she waves goodbyes. I was amused to see a human Barbie doll, a fine looking girl with such a look of translucent skin. From that day onward her beauty haunts me every single day. I prayed to God if only I could find her thinking she couldn’t be very far. Thankfully, God answered my prayers! I was lucky and saw her again on the last day of the festival. I was surprised seeing her standing alone while the people enjoyed “Thabal Chongba”. I couldn’t take my eyes off her I stared at her as if I saw an angel who came to take my spirit. She noticed my stare and responded with a smile. I couldn’t help but smile back at her. Then, she and I took part the “Thabal Chongba”. From that day I knew my life was about to change but didn’t know how.
Well, now that she had shown me the meaning of love I couldn’t hold back my over-excitement so I expressed my feelings and my emotions elucidating to her. She was a bit surprised by the nature of how I put my thoughts into words to tame her. She said, “It was too soon and totally unexpected things happen to her ”. We all knew that girls felt awkward when boys try to flirt with them. Obviously, the reply was “I’ll have to think about it”. It took days to finally get the reply and I have been dying to hear the word “YES” from her lips. Instead, she said “I can’t accept your proposal I thank you for all the compliments and feelings. I wish I could be better with you. Please try to understand I have no intentions to be with you. I’ll take you as a good friend. I hope you understand”.
was quite shocked at that very moment and the soreness came pouring down through my heart. My mind withered away and I’m lost. Like I said before “My hope and dreams have flown away along with feathers of a bird.” There’s this emotional transcendence inside of me and I tried to detain it but it came consuming me. “
As much as I’m deeply saddened by those words I tried to calm myself taking it as an act of lessons of my life sent by Universe or God. I’m still happy even though I couldn’t have her. Remember girl there will always be a place for you in my heart. In case you change your mind please let me know. I’ll embrace every moment with happiness along with those momentary fortunes of my life.

 

 

One Last Goodbye (A letter to my love which I didn’t send)

Dear, alien. I’m writing this because I want to express fully one last time. I know, I have said like a million times that “I Love You”, and you keep ignoring me. I do really, really love you. No one can deny it, even the devil’s wicked trick won’t take away my love for you. Dear, remember the world is a hideous place, it’s enormous. There will be lots of people who will destroy you and there will be some who love and care for you; among them, I am one, too. I’ll cherish everything even your saddest moments and make you smile throughout your life.

Alien, I’m always like this, you probably know it because even at the first time I said something I wrote like this. Funny! I never change. I’m a weird guy, who believe in true love because I grew up watching lots of movies. In movies or poems, they keep filling my mind about the delusions of love. But in reality, it turns out to be an utter bullshit. But still, my belief doesn’t fade away. Because the world of fictions still convinced me to believe falling in love is the most beautiful fortune of life.

You know what, a spark of hope emerges when you suddenly texted me during Yaoshang 2018. I felt relieved and quite happy because the love of my life returns to me. But when I saw you look so pale and thin, then I felt worried. I did ask what happened to you. You didn’t answer very well. But I did my best to comfort you.

Remember that day you came to the park and the day that you came to my house and we went to Kangla. It was my first time to go on a date with a beautiful girl like you. We talked, we laugh and we hugged. It was almost like a dream to me because all the things I believe happened that day. Oh! How happy I was… Remember I punched at you when you’re sitting on my bed and you weep. And we went to juice shop and drank Mosambi. The saddest part was the day you narrate your stories to me, you were there with me sitting above your vehicle. You didn’t say a word. You were silent. Remembrance causes you pain. I see it in your eyes, you distrust me and didn’t comfortable narrating your stories and yet, you let it out with tears in your eyes. Trusting me even you if it was uncomfortable. You shed tears then I cuddled you and wipe your tears. Oh! dear, I was there for you. A shoulder to cry on. And you left me alone without a word. I miss you terribly. Yes, I’m terrified without you. 

To be honest, I want you as my girlfriend because I want to prove to my friends that I’m capable of courting a girl. It was tricky, you know, the mockery they did I just can’t bear it. But you, my darling, are my reasons for my happiness. I know you love me deep inside and I can sense it. The thing is that you just can’t admit it. You fear it because you have lost the faith of love as you were betrayed by the one you loved most. If you give me just one more chance to prove my love for you. I’ll behave with everything you say. I love you…

And one last thing, I know the world feels so big, and you feel completely alone. And I do also know that you’d give anything to change the situation. I know you’re hurting yourself. All I wanna do is to reach through you and give a hug and let you know everything going to be okay. The struggle you’re going through is gonna make you who you are and make you strong. Sooner or later you’re going to fall in love with a boy again. Someone who really deserves you.  I don’t deserve you but I do love you. This is my last goodbye. Bubye, my love.

(P.S. Listen to the playlist that I made for you)

 The playlist…

  1. Radiohead – Creep
  2. My Life As Ali Thomas – Only Reason
  3. A Fine Frenzy – Almost Lover
  4. A Rocket To The Moon – Like We Used To
  5. Death Cab For Cutie – I Will Follow You Into The Dark
  6. Lord Huron – The Night We Met
  7. Elliot Smith – Between The Bars
  8. Gabrielle Aplin – Please Don’t Say You Love Me
  9. Kodaline – All I Want
  10. Kodaline – High Hopes
  11. Kodaline – Love Will Set You Free
  12. Kodaline – The One
  13. Labrinth – Jealous
  14. Lifehouse – You And Me
  15. The Killers – Here With Me
  16. Anathema – Untouchables pt. 2
  17. Echos – Gold
  18. Dodie – Sick of Losing Soulmates
  19. Sleeping At Last – Saturn
  20. Seafret – Oceans

 

The scribbles that I wrote in the notes of my smartphone…

 

I am helpless! I am weary! Sometimes I just wanna be emotionless. Someday, perhaps, I imagine seeing you once again, happy in another boy’s arms.

She was just there in my dreams! She was so happy, and I am happy in that dimension, it was so surreal. My birth of love happens in my dreams, an unreal joy, it was. It didn’t last long. It just fades away like a flashback of cinema! When I opened my eyes I found myself on my bed cuddling a pillow, streams of emotions running down while typing this on my smartphone.

Sometimes I feel lack of self-confidence, lack of self-esteem. Or it just an infatuation.

I have seen your facial beauty, your dazzling smile, even crying. And yet you’re still soulful. Perhaps, I’m hard to love because I love too hard.

She traumatized me, she came in my dreams, she tramples on me. She took my hope and dreams. In the night, every morning, she was just there not of her real body but in shadows. Am I in love or is it just my obsession and my desperation? And she’s afraid to fall in love again. She’s hating herself because the worst part of all is that she fears to love. And she hates it when there’s a battle inside her soul, between what she knows and what she feels. She’s never right to love. Every time she loves, it either her or someone else get hurts.  So she left. And that keeps breaking me a little bit more each time.

I believe that love will win, I still believe in love. Even though you flew away like a seagull over the sea. Beyond the horizon, dreaming of the light. You will be alone one day. That day your soul will seek redemption for my love. Behind your deathbed, I’ll be there for you to warm you and to set your soul free. In the last moment, you will smile for eternity.

 

Inspired by the poet Pablo Neruda, I wrote these poems for my love.

 

I. Beginning

inside a void of love –
there’s a delirium in my mind with a spectrum of confusion.
veiled by the faces of beauty;
where a part of old memories lingers unexpectedly.
baffling, I contrive a new beginning of love again.
should I enjoy?
Or should I still yearn through the depth of my melancholy?

II. Love

at a fancy restaurant,
through the corner of an artificial beauty.
I chase for love.
hunting, preying;
longing to hold a hand.

but love –
love flew through the park;
like a fallen petal that twisted with a spring breeze.
it falls, besides me, while denying my abyss.
the fallen petal –
will it sprout?
will it bloom beautifying my stranded soul?

III. Midnight

my thoughts wander –
oh! dear, the fragrance of your heart
consumes me
your fair translucent skin, your naivety, your sweet tenderness
I wish to proclaim you as my beloved.
rare beauty;
you dwell through my dreary night
encircling, twisting — my midnight vigils
you stifle, trampling on my innocent soul
half-percieved, a little of your love
dreaming, my sweet reveries runs magically
like a fiction foretold of a cinema world.
struggling beautifully to gain your love
I claim to hold the power –
yet, this mingling emotion of love and misery
doesn’t seems to fade away.

IV. Smile

the sorrows that kept me bound,
weary — I weep.
glancing the images of you
I put a smile.

V. Dying Dreams

you enter unwelcomingly
while resisting my dying dreams
you lift me up,
you break me down
oh! what a pleasant feeling!

VI. Untouchable

I am unaided now,
without the sensation of your touch
why do I feel like you’re walking through the edges of my life?
there’s a barrier between us, unexpressed feelings.
inside there’s a strong untouchable senseless feeling.
do I have to let you go?

VII. Paralyze

I abolish all my pain and sorrows
when I saw the elegance of your gorgeousness
and, yes, I’m paralyzed.

VIII. Confused

you leave me in a state of confusion
perturbed, I lost track of my path.
I’m a puppet to you
pulled by the strings of your love
a heart made up of plastic is all you’ve got
I wish I could burn it
to melt your plastic heart.

IX. The Words

I have said those four-letter words.
my sweet loving girl! you seem surprised!
yes, I truly love you.
these feelings I have been chasing, dying to receive yours.
inside I miss you, I feel anxious, too.
unspoken words through your ears.
my solitary soul yearns for your love.
I weep, ’cause I feel lonely without you.

X. Poetry

you came along with words of my poetry.
looking through your eyes;
I saw a window of your soul.
I peered looking inside the window.
I see a soul with an angel heart.

XI. Amaze

the utter amazement of your soul
kept me dawdling
while admiring the essence of your prepossessing looks.

XII. Remembrance

memories linger unexpectedly once again –
of the night we met.
remembrance of your beauty haunts me
your ghost dwell — every night
disturbing my sleep
destroying my sweet dreams

XIII. Mood Swing

your denial makes me sad
your sweet embrace makes me happy

XIV. The Game

this never-ending game I’ve been playing.
trapped in one level; never achieving new
I tried to uninstall the game
but somehow you tame me with your sudden presence.

XV. The Cigarette

at the solitary cafe
I sat alone with a cigarette on my hand
puffing and inhaling; the smoke
each puff I tried to push away the thought of her
to deny those feelings;
her unloved senseless emotions.
the cigarette I hold burns
with a fume of smoke
perhaps it is my disinterred heart that she threw away.
now it burns mercilessly on my hand.

XVI. Desperate

stumbling and crumbling I crawl on my bed
cuddling the pillow while missing you
with a phone my hand.
wanting to text you
desperately

XVII.  The People

people’s opinion seems to revolve around me
they murmur about my love for you
they said just let it go.
but I can’t –
I’m restless and sleepless every night.
how can I be a man when you keep a barrier between us.
for a minute
I tried to let you go, however, with your sweet voice,
you kept in chained.

XVIII. Love or Lust

my attachment to you is making me vulnerable.
why do I need to rely on you?
is it love or lust?
I’m confused.

 

I have been told I am too dramatic, I have been told that I am too delusional. While writing this I have been through a lot of heartaches. I don’t even know why I wrote this. Maybe with a hope of reaching it to her, I pondered these words. I wish I could find love in someone like her. Thank you, for everything for showing me what love is. Now, I, myself, understand and I believe in love, and I look for one and only love; my mother. And my first and true love whom I let go. Love exists deep inside my soul.  One day “Love” will win!

 

To my reader, if I let you read this. I consider you as my trusted friend or family. Thank you for reading my soul’s voice.

My obsession with Steven Wilson’s music.

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As people showed lots of enthusiasm to me for my previously written article, some of my close friends insisted to write more on this stuff on Progressive music. After the first article I wrote, I thought of writing new. While thinking I lay on my bed and I remembered a 50-year-old British dude named “Steven Wilson”, a former frontman of the band “Porcupine Tree” and a great figure of modern Progressive Rock. I reminded myself that why shouldn’t I write about this guy; he’s a muse of my poetry. Then I turn on my laptop and wrote this…

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He is known for his melancholic music and a poetic lyrics with an imaginative artwork. He made the listeners’ soul filled with sadness with his depressing music, despite all his music, he is also a cinephile and he compiled a story about loneliness, depression, abandonment, etc. And he narrated it through conceptually, and some through tracks.

Through this article/blog, I’ll explore more about his work, side projects, and solo albums. I will also compile some of my post I posted before through some social media; which is my reviews and songs description. And above all, my exploration of his greatest album “Hand. Cannot. Erase.”; which happens to be my favorite album of all time. And the excitement of witnessing him performing live at Shillong.

About discovering his music, it was in the year 2013, my best friend made me listen to the song “Lazarus”. For the first time, when I listen to it the piano arpeggios, it amazed me, during that period I didn’t understand the lyrics. However, with the tunes, I easily fell in love with the music, soon after that, perhaps a few months later, my best friend found out his solo project and he then made me listen to “The Raven That Refused To Sing”.

Ah! “The Raven That Refused To Sing”, how will I describe it? When I heard it for the first time I didn’t understand anything, it was just boring. As I have known music through every genre I found out it was just an amazing artwork, and it impacted so many people. The song paralyzed the listeners’ hearts with full of emotional feelings. The music video does melt it too, with an artistic work from Jess Cope the music video narrates a story about an old man at the end of his life who wants to die. He thinks back to a time of his childhood reminiscent when he was incredibly close to his older sister. She was everything to him, and he was everything to her. Unfortunately, she died when they were both very young.

 

 

“Drive Home”

This is a song which has a chilling sense of sadness, and it is also accompanied by the wistful calm of Wilson’s voice. And the heavy sob of Guthrie Govan’s solo brings back the sorrow and memories – of a night spent with one’s head buried in the pillow – letting loose in a stream of emotions – flooding the pillow cover by the tears. This song is one of the Steven’s best work so far… it is a form of medication for a wounded soul. One of the finest track I have ever listened. And I’m very sorry that I couldn’t describe the music video.

 

 

 

Half-Light by Porcupine Tree.

Every human who knows music fell in love with Pink Floyd’s Coming Back To Life, because of the opening guitar tunes with an ambiance. It turns out to be a mainstream music and lost the power of emotions that comes with the song. But, don’t worry, there’s a good song which I would call “The Perfection of Melancholy Music”. The song Half-Light tells a story about a mother who just lost her child – the mother yearns for her child’s shadow when darkness engulfs the midnight vigils. Through the half-light, the murky shadow comforts her loneliness. In my experience with this song, I cried when I missed my mom – missing her so badly that I needed her to hold me(It was during her journey to some other state). However, let me shorten it up, this is another piece of beautiful art.

 

Now it comes to the part of my favorite album. “Hand. Cannot. Erase.”

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I think I couldn’t be able to find the words to describe this flourishing album. This stylistically, moody concept album. It narrates a story of Joyce Carol Vincent, a real-life incident of a girl whose skeletal remains was found in her flat with her TV still switched on. The concept was loosely borrowed from the documentary film “Dreams Of Life”, Steven showed it and he wanted to turn it into his work. Well, thankfully he did it.

Beautifully written with a devastating story behind, the album captures the feelings of a young and charming girl about a solitary life she lived. The tracks have up and down moods, a conflict between happiness and sadness, or perhaps a life living between light and dark. Furthermore, it explores the irresistible imagination and the grand vision of lonely life.

I’ll just add three songs from this album.

 

“Perfect Life”

The music video was loosely adapted from the Australian film “Picnic At The Hanging Rock”. It depicted with a character of two young siblings who once had a great and joyful life and mysteriously the older sister get lost leaving without any trace. Musically, there are rhythmic beats of electronic percussion with a soft voice of a woman narrating a story, piercing the listeners’ ears with tunes of melancholy coming out of nowhere making the listeners remembered their past life. Eventually, this song is not just a music, instead, I would prefer it as a masterpiece work of an art.

 

“Routine”

Routine was a fifth track from the album, “Hand. Cannot. Erase.”. And there has been some twisting story inside of it. The song was literally the most depressing song he has ever written, Steven himself said it. And here’s the statement he spoke about the song at one of his interviews.

“Amongst the hundreds of songs I have written over the years Routine has a very special place. It’s a deeply sad story of loss and denial, but at its conclusion the clouds lift and there is acceptance at least. Having worked with her on 3 previous videos, I knew as soon as I wrote it that it was perfect for Jess to do something amazing with. Even then nothing prepared me for the organic beauty and power of the film she made, a painstaking labour of love that took her months to produce. When we play the song live I look out into the audience and see people swept away with emotion at the combination of music and animation. To find poetry and beauty in sadness is a wonderful thing I think.” – Steven Wilson

Before portraying the song, I will add some few words, we all accept that all human being suffers. The pains and sorrows are real, it’s a big part of the reality we exist -‘Routine’ starts with a piano notes commingling with a wistful voice of Steven, adding with a voice from Ninet Tayeb, the guitars plucking, and piano mingled, creating a deep longing melancholy tunes. The song pulls out the distraught and painful emotions of the listeners. The music video shows a lonely woman in an animated version; cleaning, rubbing, washing and most of the daily household work. Leisuring her time to forget about her loss. The song ends with an enchanting poetic lyrics…

“The most beautiful morning forever
Like the ones from far off, far off away
With the hum of the bees in the jasmine sway
Don’t ever let go 
Try to let go”

 

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“Happy Returns”

Super-catchy song! A super-genius song, remarkably breathtaking. Brilliant in every sense. I will not describe it fully, I will simply say that this is the song the put on to repeat mode.

 

Aside from his solo project and Porcupine Tree, Steven works differently with his other experimental projects. An alternative band like “Blackfield”, an ambient-electronic project named “Bass Communion” and most importantly a collaborative music project with Mikael Akerfeldt of Opeth, experimenting a music with dark-ambient and psychedelic folk.

I’ll list some few Blackfield songs, which I find intriguing. Perhaps the best ones…

 

“Pain” by Blackfield

With a vibe of the alternative music, Steven collaborated with Isreal artist Aviv Geffen. This is a soulful song and an astonishing piece of music.

 

 

Taken from their fifth album…

 

 

“Thank You (Alanis Morissette cover)”

The opening was almost similar to ‘Half-light’, even if it was a cover song it was definitely better than the original version. Maybe it was because I’m so much into this guy.

 

Bass Communion is a dark-ambient music project by Steven. It has an artistic soundscape created by noise from the musical instruments. It is somewhat dark and gloomy and the sound they produced was some kind of horrifying sound.

 

“Storm Corrosion”

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“Drag Rope” by Storm Corrosion

The song conjured up the darkest depth of plaintive emotions, musically, the song starts to sing with a voice of Mikael Åkerfeldt later added with Wilson’s voice, and ends with a cinematic score-like orchestral violin music, making it a perfect music to fall asleep. The music video has a creative screenwriting like Tim Burton’s films. It was dark and gritty.

 

His latest album “To The Bone” (2017)

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“To The Bone” was a fifth solo album of Steven Wilson. An album mostly based on the idea of postmodernism. The album narrates how our modern technologies affect our lives, of our modern world where we are so consumed by the social media, in which we discussed what is right or wrong. Some about terrorism, etc. Like always Steven tells the most perfect stories. Even though it was less conceptual.

Musically, Steven focused more on Pop tunes, not of modern pop music, but an old pop song. Still, there are some progressive tunes, tracks like “Refuge” and “Detonation” have good progressive elements.  His music is changed, yet I still found his ambitious sound, the melody and melancholic tunes, and extension guitar solos.

Personally, I find this album so intriguing, and there’s a strong sense in his songs like when I listen to it I felt like he’s telling a story of my daily life.

“Pariah”

Being the first single from the album, the tracks “Pariah” is the best song if I have to choose one. The song well describes exactly how modern technology affect our mind, about being dull and lazy. Comforting ourselves with a sense of alter ego created through social media, yet in reality, we are all lonely. With simple guitar chords, Steven sang it with catchy melodious vocals of Ninet. In this particular song, Ninet’s voice sang with a very intense high range vocals, making the listeners pierced their heart out with full of sadness and melancholy. The lyrics were so beautiful that it really touches my lonely soul.

“I’m tired of Facebook
Tired of my failing health
I’m tired of everyone
And that includes myself
Well being alone now
It doesn’t bother me
But not knowing if you are
That’s been hell you see”

“Song Of I”

The track “Song Of I” sounds more like his “Porcupine Tree” days music and it is literally a mash-up of his previous songs “Sleep Together” and “Index”. It was a song about lust, about our temptation towards pornography and sex.

 

“Nowhere Now”

Steven described this song as a song that is very much influenced by David Bowie’s “Space Oddity”. It was written from the perspective from space…

 

 

“Permanating”

Well, this is a very entertaining song, and it is the happiest music he has ever written. With an influenced by the 80s Pop band “ABBA”, the song brings back the reminiscent of their greatest hit “Mamma Mia!”. From his travel in India, he was enamored with the Bollywood cultures of India. In this music video, the dancers’ dances in a style of modern Bollywood songs, spreading colors depicting an Indian festival of Holi. Throughout his carrier, with his decades of being a musician, he never smiles in his musical work. Well, in this video, he did smile a bit. This is the most catchy song from him…

 

“Space Oddity (David Bowie cover)

As a tribute to legendary musician Davie Bowie, he sang with beautiful Ninet Tayeb at one of his concerts…

 

I would love to add more songs, but I’ll end here. There are lots of good songs that I didn’t add here. I will come to the part of my experience about his concert.

 

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The picture above is my simple collections of his artworks.

“Steven Wilson live at Shillong  (NH7 Weekender 2016)”

Remembering my experiences will be little hard, and I might not be able to put all the details of my planning and my travel, or might forget to add the names of people who had had help me.

In the summer of 2016, while scrolling my Facebook page timeline, NH7 Weekender announced that the major headlining band will be “Steven Wilson”. Seeing the image of an announcement I was a little bit excited but after a second thought tear runs down my face thinking if I could afford to travel for the concert. I was absorbed with a bit of sadness, thinking, “Ah! Not again, why do I even born in this state which doesn’t have a good taste in music?, Will I be able to go?”. Soon after I told my best friend about the good news, and he said, “Well, he’s a fucking God and why shouldn’t we go? let’s just travel and see him”. I was bit excited because of his enthusiasm.

I asked my Mom that if she could give me some money to travel, Mom said, “I think I could be able to give some, but I’ll need some time.”. While waiting, the plan seems to fade away. Though my loving best friend can’t wait and see the possibilities of canceling, so, he just took out the money from his pocket and we booked the flight. (I did return the money, but still, I’m very thankful to you, my dear best friend.)

The very saddening thing that happened was that my best friend had to stay back due to some serious sickness. It was just a pain, but he would want me to go. So I went without him.

It was October 20, 2016, I took a flight and landed at Guwahati and stays at Bro M place and Bro B helps me with everything at my travels(Still, Thankful to both of you).

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Ticket for the concert.

I’m not much of a travel blogger, so, I couldn’t be able to write in details. I’ll just shorten it up.

We travel at Shillong by taxi, I put on my favorite album while traveling the long road. We stayed at a cheap hotel, everything just went well.

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Billboard of the concert, I took this from the hotel I was staying.

The event was for two days, on the first day, we took and cab and rode to the place of an event. When we reached the venue, I was surprised by the people gathering around and the five big enormous stages. We went to the counter to check-in the tickets we hold. The venue was filled with headbangers, musicians, beautiful girls, people from various places, it was huge. The loud soundscape everything, I felt like I was in heaven.

 

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Picture took at the venue(I look like some kind of Hobo)

Anyway, the first band I saw performing was “Vertical Horizon”. Not much of their fan. I only knew their song, “Best I Ever Had” and thankfully, they sang it. Throughout the day, I gallivant around and meet up with people and talked about music and so on. Later I met up with brothers and we rode back to the hotel.

The following day(The greatest day of my life), I woke up, roam around the street took a breakfast, spent the day at the hotel waiting for the event time to arrive.

Same as the other day, we rode, enter the venue, get lost in the crowd, and I was very much excited because it was my dreams becoming reality.

While waiting for Steven to perform on stage, I wandered around and watched other bands performing. One band that got me was an Experimental Post-Rock band named “aswekeepsearching” and I was thrilled by their music. While watching them I never got a chance to witnessed Steven very close.

Well, comes to the part of King of Prog music taking the stage.

As a big fan of his music, I had a rewarding experience, if I have to say. And here I plan to write all about the event that I remember.

The crowd was thrilled when the light put off playing a music at a background, and shouted, “Steven! Steven! Steven!”. For minutes the crowd shouted. I was in the middle of a crowd. The light put on and the God himself took the stage playing the song “Ancestral”. I had an epiphany, a weird feeling of happiness. And I can’t imagine myself witnessing him with my own eye, it was not on screen, but my own naked eye.

The performance was an act of five-piece band. Along with Wilson on the guitars and vocals, there was Dave Kilmister on lead guitar, Adam Holzman on keyboard and synth, Craig Blundell on drums and Nick Beggs on bass guitars. The sound quality of the performance makes the crowd feel as if they were listening to a high-audio through headphones.

The setlist of the performance are:

  1. Ancestral
  2.  Hand. Cannot. Erase.
  3. Routine
  4. Lazarus (Porcupine Tree song)
  5. Home Invasion
  6. Regret #9
  7. Happy Returns
  8.  Ascendant Here On
  9. Harmony Korine
  10.  Index
  11. Vermillioncore
  12. Sleep Together (PT song)
  13.  The Sound Of Muzak(PT song)
  14. The Raven That Refused To Sing

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It was such a magical experience, and of course, everybody in the audiences was crazy too. I completely lost myself there. The performance was spectacular. Everything just felt like a dream.

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The clear image of him.

(I look forward to going back to his concert if he comes back in India. I really, really loved his music.

To Steven Wilson, I know this will never to reach him. But, Mr. Wilson, Thank you for dedicating your life to music. Thank you for your wonderful lyrics, and above all thank you for accompanying thousands of lost souls (including me). Your music is such an inspiration, your music is my hope. May you live long and create more good music.

Lastly, I would love to give my thanks to my wonderful Mom, for making her only son achieving his dreams, for all the budgets of my travels. To my best friend, for showing enthusiasm and for making it a success(and for introducing his music). And to those of people who traveled with me and help me through my journey. And most importantly, to my readers. If you haven’t read and appreciated my previous article/blog. This would not have been born. Thank you, if you have read this, and if you satisfied with my writing feel free to share it with your friends or any social media. Who knows? If you share this it might reach to Steven himself. Thank you!

My explanation of favourite Tool’s songs.

First of all, let me clarify that I’m not a good writer. The fact I’m about to write this article is about my experience of loving Progressive music, and how it changed my perspective of understanding life. Let me start by explicating my ideas of listening music.

“People enjoy music on many levels. Some people enjoy it sonic way – they just dig the riffs, beats, and melodies in the music because they make them feel something, for whatever reason. And there are some people who really get lost in the lyrics and what they mean, whether that be what the band intended them to mean, or their own interpretation.”

What is progressive music? Question arises! I know, there will be different answers. Some will say it’s a music mainly focused on long minutes, and mostly instrumental. But according to me or in my humble opinion I’ll say it’s a journey(a musical journey) which takes us into a whole new level of virtuality, or a vivid tapestry or maybe an imaginary world. Most of the progressive albums were all conceptual; narrating a story of which the musicians want to tell. It’s like reading a good novel or watching a good film. Progressive music has a habit of telling a story filled with philosophical ideas.

I discovered prog-music in late teens, the first prog band I listened was “Dream Theater”. Their music has a way of creating a music of technicality and lyrically telling stories about fighting anxiety and depression(obviously, I found out later when I understand the lyrics). Throughout my life of listening prog-music for seven years with numerous good bands, which probably bands like Steven Wilson(who happens to be my biggest inspiration), Opeth, Porcupine Tree, Haken, Between The Buried And Me, Anathema, Tesseract, etc. And I can add only one band; the band who awakens me, it’s none other than “Tool”, yes, Tool, the greatest fucking band ever.

I discovered them almost one and half years ago, I know it’s late, but who cares its just a music. Since I found out this band I have been awestruck and have been listening to it and waiting for a new album(Older fans have been waiting for ten years, I just can’t imagine it myself).  It was one of my friend’s brother who made me listen to them(Thank you, bro). He said as you have loved music did you know “Tool”, and I said I know them but I haven’t listened to them. Well, you should then and he played “Lateralus”. From that moment I fell in love with this band.

The reason I’ve found myself so drawn to Tool is there’s a special combination of factors. Their interpretation of Spirituality, Philosophy, and Art. The awareness of psychedelic, and using human psyche to explore the realms of spirituality. And I’ve also found their music so powerful and dynamic, but also very layered and complex, so that each time I hear an album, for many, many repeats listens, I hear something new.

Maynard’s vocals carry an energetic, yet clean with an enigmatic lyrics. And he penned down the lyrics in a deep sense. I have analyzed some songs. And I’ll interpret my understanding of their lyrics. I have done some research on the internet and there will be some similarity or some may consider as plagiarism. However, I wrote this just share the knowledge behind their music.

I’m a person who always fascinated with profound knowledge, and love Psychology, and Philosophy. Like the book “The Interpretation of Dream” by Sigmund Freud, Maynard explores the realms of dreams and reality. I have research, read some books, and I find some answers

“Lateralus”

“Over thinking, over analyzing separates the body from the mind Withering my intuition leaving all these opportunities behind”

Lateralus was a song from the self-titled album “Lateralus”. It explores the desire to explore the outer bounds of human possibility in a mental and spiritual sense. To look deep within and beyond, to try to see what we are, what we can be, and how we are connected with the universe around us.

“I embrace my desire to
I embrace my desire to feel the rhythm, to feel connected
Enough to step aside and weep like a widow
To feel inspired, to fathom the power,
To witness the beauty, to bathe in the fountain,
To swing on the spiral, to swing on the spiral,
To swing on the spiral of our divinity and still be a human.”

Here it describes how our spirits float through the emptiness when we’re awakened. To release all our openness, vulnerability, joy, wonder, and peace to forward –  of how far can we go, how deep? How much can we push? What are we capable of? How do we progress?

 

“Parabol & Parabola”

“So familiar and overwhelmingly warm
This one, this form I hold now.
Embracing you, this reality here,
This one, this form I hold now, so
Wide-eyed and hopeful.
Wide-eyed and hopefully wild.We barely remember what came before this precious moment,
Choosing to be here right now. Hold on, stay inside…
This body holding me, reminding me that I am not alone in
This body makes me feel eternal. All this pain is an illusion.”
 
This song is about our body and pain-body. It is much about of not freeing ourselves from pain and sorrow. The pain we created by our self-image by denying our true selves. Resisting our inner conscious mind. The denial of inner consciousness, the conflict between our mortals’ form and inner soul.
                    “Reflection”
“And in my darkest moment, fetal and weeping
The moon tells me a secret – my confidant
As full and bright as I am
This light is not my own and
A million light reflections pass over me”
Everyone has a dark side, and a moment consuming by darkness. I’ve been to some darkest hours, and I’ve made some several references to Buddhist philosophy, and from books about personal growth. The concepts were useful, however, in making the explanation.  It says to feel free to think generally, to extend, or to reduce the interpretation to make it our own.
“So crucify the ego, before it’s far too late
To leave behind this place so negative and blind and cynical,
And you will come to find that we are all one mind
Capable of all that’s imagined and all conceivable.
Just let the light touch you
And let the words spill through
And let them pass right through
Bringing out our hope and reason…
before we pine away.”
And it asked questions like; What if I’m digging in the wrong direction? What if there is no self but what I imagine. What ‘light’ am I a reflector of? So begins a journey toward the abandonment of self. The Buddhist realization of enlightenment is achieved in a similar way, (there is also a correlation with the New Age notions of collective consciousness).
                                                “Third Eye”
Think for yourself. Question authority. Think for yourself. Question authority.
Throughout human history, as our species has faced the frightening, terrorising fact that we do not know who we are or where we are going in this ocean of chaos, it has been the authorities – the political, the religious, the educational – authorities who attempted to comfort us, by giving us order, rules, regulations; informing, forming in our minds their view of reality. To think for yourself you must question authority, and learn how to put yourself in a state of vulnerable open-mindedness – chaotic, confused vulnerability – to inform yourself.
Think for yourself. Question authority…  – Timothy Leary
“Shroud-ing all the ground around me
Is this holy crow above me.
Black as holes within a memory
And blue as our new second sun.
I stick my hand into his shadow
To pull the pieces from the sand.
Which I attempt to reassemble
To see just who I might have been.
I do not recognize the vessel,
But the eyes seem so familiar.
Like phosphorescent desert buttons
Singing one familiar song…”
It might be the beginning of hallucination, but because it seems to be closer to the true theme of the song, it might also be the beginnings of deep meditation. It might be also from psychoactive drugs and mediation stimulating the similar parts of the brain.
The general theme is one of trying to achieve enlightenment. Through the teaching of Spirituality, the third eye represents the spiritual, astral or mind’s eye, commonly illustrated as residing in the forehead. It also makes an appears as one of the four higher chakras – the crowning chakra, which provides connection to the universe beyond.
‘Third eye’ also refers to the human pineal gland, which is stimulated by both hallucinogens and deep meditation.
                       “Forty-Six & 2”
I’ve been crawling on my belly
Clearing out what could’ve been.
I’ve been wallowing in my own confused and insecure delusions
For a piece to cross me over
Or a word to guide me in.
I wanna feel the changes coming down.
I wanna know what I’ve been hiding in
My shadow.
My shadow.
In my experience, this song is about insecurity, about being numb. Fighting with our darkest shadows. When life is mundane, mind created another self-image. If forms into some kind of personality. The shadow that refers to the song is that the mental formation(Which is the voice inside our head). It also illustrates the idea that journeying within the self and ultimately confronting of the parts of ourselves we deny isn’t an easy task. What can we find to open up everything we hide and is afraid of in ourselves?
So far these five songs are all I can easily interpret. Through writing this, I have read books by Eckhart Tolle’s “The Power of Now” and “A New Earth”, “Buddha Mind, Buddha Body” by Thich Nhat Hanh, watched the interviews of Maynard on YouTube, read the comments of fans around the world.
Above all, the reason why I wrote this wasting my time is that I want people to understand that music can also be a source of understanding our life.

Just as a reminder, modern progressive metal bands: Tesseract, Veil Of Maya, Northlane, Born Of Osiris, Periphery, Skyharbor, etc. I think their lyrical theme was loosely influenced by “Tool” lyrical theme(Philosophy and Psychedelics). As I have listened most of it, and I could find some similarity like narrating themes of Conscious Mind, Spirituality, questioning reality, new age, dreams, etc. The thing is that; maybe I listened too much of it, and it affected my mind with their view of reality. So, my problems with viewing the world seem to be different. I felt like a child, felt a bit of naive, in some sense. After all, I guess, it was all the influence on my musical journey. Perhaps, I should try to explore more, or focused on more to reality; which is taking responsibility.

Thank You, if you have read so far.

My Vociferation

I’m not an educated man;
the way I expressed in English doesn’t define it.
I’m not an educated man;
I don’t have a good degree from recognized college.
I’m not an educated man;
My grades were low in my high school reports.
I’m not an educated man.
 
Some said,
“Focus on your studies”
and some snatched my dreams.
Single parented with a household of the noisy surrounding.
Financially struggling to raise me.
 
Time deceived us –
My mortal form carried by time.
Ageing life, Young Adult
If I may say.
 
Regrets haunt!
I’m lost in the spectrum of
Reality and delusions
I confined myself to entrust my soul.
Reality hits hard
Delusion keeps my soul numb.
 
Thoughts says,
“Past is just a story we told ourselves”
Mortals judged me by my past actions.
 
To some, I’m a hippie
To some, I’m a junkie
To some, I’m a pilgrim
To some, I’m a Philosopher.
 
This is the vociferation of my failed life.
My outcry of not being an educated man.
And yes, I’m not an educated man.

A Letter To My Psychopathic Crush

Dear,

How shall I start? Should I start with describing your spacious world or your beauty of your soul? Where shall I start? I don’t know, yet I still want to express it. As I have made a friendship with you and exchanged texts of our innermost thoughts, desires, and dreams. I could perceive your world and could feel your lonely soul. You know, each heart need a courage to speaks out, but fears manipulate the courage of expressing my feelings towards you. How so? I don’t know, I simply can’t express it. We haven’t met face to face or haven’t been long of our friendship. But something struck inside my soul, a vague feeling of joy or happiness. And you know, I was lonely and down before I met you. I was so lonely that I cried and lay in tears wetting my pillow with tears of sadness. I was in a state of deep melancholia. Just waiting for someone to knock on my door. I don’t know if the universe sent you to lift up my soul. You cleanse my soul from loneliness, you are the words for my poetry. Is this the power of love? Am I being set free by your accompany? Being in your company I felt relieved and happy. I don’t know, why I’m writing this and I don’t know if could ever send this to you. Could it be my thoughts on being in love with you or amazed by your intelligence? You are so unique, and you have a personality that people find hard to gain. Your madness, your insanity, your profound knowledge, and your deepest dreams, it was numerous. You mingle with your soul and you trust your own instinct. You distrust people around you, yet you narrate a story of your past relationships to me. Why? Because sometimes you felt so lonely and eroding your deepest thoughts to someone felt free. How did I know? Because I sometimes felt it too. I could feel your presence when I listen to your voice. My solitary dreams dreamt of you – of the world you live, of how you enjoy being yourself. Beyond your lovely thoughts, there’s an enormous sea with a tidal wave; a wave full of compassion and humanity, a wave of lights which elucidates like a blazing sun. And the questions you asked me about being helplessness, worthlessness, and hopelessness. Why did you ask it? I couldn’t give you the right answer because I don’t feel like to share my darkest secret. Maybe I already hide it, or maybe I don’t want my sadness to linger once again. Remembering so, I might end up being depressed once again. But as you ask I will surely clarify some of it. Yes, I have suffered from all kind of anxiety and depressions. I have seen some ghostly figures, sometimes heavy thoughts of paranoia just whirled inside my head and I already fight and overcome it. Let’s just skip it, you, my dear, you’re my psychopathic crush. One thing I love about you is your sudden shouting and yelling. And also that one thing that we always do, sharing our love of music. Some sad songs, and some that describe our souls. I admire everything about you.

I am a fish drowning in the ocean of chaos. A wave of anguish tormented me. But, you, my little one, you flew above me like a lonely seagull hunting for a prey to feed on. You, my dear, you flew here with hope and dreams along with a feather of life. Catch me, dear for I am a drowning fish. Fulfill your hunger. Quench your thirst. Set me free!

You filled my soul, you emerged out of nowhere like a butterfly in my dreams. And I who lived in confines of solitude yearns for your company.

If you happen to read this, remind yourself that I can’t cover this fire burning in my heart. You are the only one who can put off this fire. I know you don’t believe in love or relationship. I know you have trust issues, and no one could ever tame you. But those days of hiding yourself will be gone. I’m lost in your feelings, and it’s hard to imagine myself that I’m drifting into your world. I know that you don’t believe in love, you despise it. But, dear, I can tell you that you’re the love of my life. And yes, I know I don’t deserve you. This might be too fast and I have been to some unfulfilled love before because of not being to able to express my feelings. I was so scared of life journey, I have crawled, insecure and delusion but you have awakened my soul now.

It’s okay, that you want your journey to be alone, I understand it completely. Maybe I’m too delusional thinking our friendship will turn some kind of romance. I don’t really know. Like you always told me that “Reality does hit really hard”. Take it as a compliment towards your personality, or maybe a pseudo-poet dream-romance.

These things happen only in movies and novels. The real world doesn’t happen this.

I can’t give you nothing but words. These profound emotions are the only thing I will end up giving it to you. This is the thing I told you about that one day I’ll describe everything about you.

It’s okay, though, even if you don’t want to be in a relationship. I don’t know if this is my proposal or showing my appreciations towards you. I really don’t know. I’m so into you! Maybe I love you. Yes, I do really love you.

 

Yours secret admire

Tomchi

A New Hope (as titled by my friend)

Encircling mind, intertwined.

Mingling thoughts of love, I declined.

A new love or perhaps a psychonaut’s thought.

How shall I define?

It might be a peevish thought, I refined.

A new sprout of my life, is it?

Or a lust for my childlike mind.

Enamored by her intelligence.

Seduced by her elegance.

My weariness, I purify.

My loneliness, I crucify.